


Another Sleepless Night

by SorakuFett



Series: A Normal Life [8]
Category: Persona 5, Persona Series
Genre: Aged-Up Character(s), Angst and Hurt/Comfort, Character Death In Dream, Dreams and Nightmares, F/M, Late Night Conversations, Marriage, Older Woman/Younger Man, Persona 5 Spoilers, Post-Canon, Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder - PTSD, Scars, The Phantom Thieves have Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-08-01
Updated: 2018-08-01
Packaged: 2019-06-19 22:04:42
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,082
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/15519600
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/SorakuFett/pseuds/SorakuFett
Summary: Though they defeated The Mad God of Control  and saved the world from being merged with Mementos, The Phantom Thieves were not left without their scars, both physically and emotionally. It has been years since their victory, but they are all still haunted by what happened. Most days, it doesn't intrude into their lives. But every once in a while, the memories, as well as the emotions associated with them, rear their heads.





	Another Sleepless Night

_**So... You still believe you can win this game? MY game?! Don't be ridiculous. You are all nothing more than petulant children, pawing like animals at something you cannot comprehend.** _

Yaldabaoth's gaze - if you could call it that - bored into their souls. His massive form befitted his power. He was truly above and beyond anything they had faced before.

The God of Control slashed at them again with his sword. Queen, Fox and Skull dodged in time, and Joker managed to block it, but the others are wounded. Dr. Takemi's medicine has long since been depleted. They're all running on fumes, and they know it. The citizens of Tokyo below them panic in the streets below, but the Thieves don't know if they have the strength to keep going. Joker, Queen and Mona cannot treat their injuries any more.

They have put up a valiant effort. But it is not enough.

_**I believe I have toyed with you enough. I gave you a choice, Trickster. An opportunity to live. To preserve this cesspool you call "society." And your answer was to spit in my face. So I shall insult you in kind. The bonds you have forged give you the strength to face me, do they not? Then watch, Trickster. Watch as I break those bonds.** _

In the shining facets of his body, the Thieves could see images. Images of the ones they cared for. Mishima. Boss. Sae. Takemi. Yoshida. Sadayo. And so on. All of their friends and loved ones, as well as many others the world over. Slowly, one by one, they began... vanishing. Fading, just as the Thieves themselves had hours ago. They were in agony, unable to comprehend what was happening, both to the world and to themselves.

_**Yuuki Mishima. Your dear friend and strongest supporter, believing in you when the world would not.** _

_**Sojiro Sakura. Your caretaker, secret-keeper and caring father-figure.** _

_**Sae Nijima. The tireless warrior of justice, liberated by your words and deeds.** _

_**Tae Takemi. The healer of wounds, keeper of your health and sanity.** _

_**Munehisa Iwai. Your armorer, providing many of the tools you have used to oppose me.** _

_**Ichiko Ohya. The journalist, following and telling the tales of your deeds and your so-called "bravery."** _

_**Shinya Oda. The valiant child, with a gifted mind for modern tactics that he shared freely with you.** _

_**Toranosuke Yoshida. The politician, who preaches the righteousness of your actions, inspiring others to follow you.** _

_**Hifumi Togo. The warlord in an age of peace, instructing you harshly in the art of warfare.** _

_**Chihaya Mifune. The seer, guiding you on a path to the fortune and favor you can no longer reach.** _

_**Sadayo Kawakami. Your teacher, dedicated to your development, as well as to the heart of your leader.** _

_**Gaze, Trickster, as they pay the price for your defiance and blasphemy.** _

One by one, their confidants had faded from existence. One by one, they cried out to anyone who would hear them. One by one... they died.

"DAAAAD!!!" "SIIIIIIIIS!!!" "SADAYOOOOOO!!"

The pain of loss had broken them. All they had fought for was being systematically destroyed by an uncaring, unloving, unholy "god." But they had no time to mourn. For when they were gone, more faces appeared on the surface of the Holy Grail's body. Ryuji's mother. Shiho. Iwai's son, Kaoru. All vanishing. All dying. And not only that, the Thieves themselves began to be consumed by their elements and fade.

Ryuji seized in pain as lightning crackled through him. He tried his hardest to hold on, but every bolt tore through him.

Morgana was slammed into the ground, a hurricane-force wind pounding the defiant attendant into submission.

Ann's leather suit caught fire, searing her skin. She panicked, frantically attempting to put out the flames to no avail.

Winter winds and hail assaulted Yusuke, as his body began shaking and suffering from vicious frostbite.

A solid beam of pure radiation soaked Makoto. She felt her skin burn, her insides boiling.

Futaba's body began being converted into digital data, seemingly deleting itself as her suit's lights turned a bloody red.

Haru clutched her head as her mind was assaulted. Blood trickled lightly from her nose as she valiantly tried to fight it off.

Finally, a reddish-black pool formed beneath Akira, chains bursting forth to bind him, shadowy hands clawing at him.

_**Merry Christmas, Trickster. I give you... OBLIVION.** _

 

Akira burst awake in a pained panic. His breathing was heavy. He looked around the room. It was dark. He looked to his side. He breathed a sight of relief as he saw his beloved wife, Sadayo Kurusu, lying peacefully asleep. He looked to the clock. 2:08 AM. And nowhere near Christmas Eve, 2016.

Akira looked at himself. He wasn't that teenage boy who fought the manipulators of society anymore. He was a grown man in his twenties, with few scars left from those days, only the worst of them adorning his bare chest and back. He clutched his wrist, the burning feeling of the chains in the dream having bled into his waking mind.

He wiped the sweat from his brow, breathing deeply in an effort to calm himself quietly. He didn't want to wake Sadayo with his nightmare. It would just be another sleepless night for him now. He slowly got out of bed, or as slowly as his shaking would allow, and quietly opened the door, stepping out the bedroom. 

He walked downstairs to the kitchen, thinking to grab something so calm his nerves. He opened the refrigerator and grabbed some milk. He reached to grab a glass, hearing the pitter-patter of Morgana's footsteps approaching. He turned back to see the cat, the two both breathing a sigh of relief as they see each other. 

"You had the dream again, didn't you?" the cat asked his friend and former comrade. 

"Yeah. Did you have one too?" Akira replied. He knew that he wasn't the only one to have the nightmares. They had all talked about it, but there wasn't much that could be done for them. Even with what little bits of Wakaba's surviving research having wormed their way into the academic and scientific circles, the very idea of "cognitive pscience" or the existence of a "Metaverse" was poorly understood, let alone taken very seriously. Of course, they had all been to therapy, having gone to individual and group sessions to talk about their experiences. But it only helped them tough through it. There was no true hope of healing their scars.

"No. But you were making noises, that _did_ wake me up. So thanks for that, frizzy." the cat teased. Akira laughed quietly as he poured himself a glass of milk. Morgana still acted tough, but his pain with these nightmares was occasionally apparent. Akira and Sadayo would usually find him curled up beside them on the bed after a nightmare, but if it was  _this_ nightmare, he would be wide awake, probably watching TV. The first time Sadayo saw that, back when Akira was in college, she had a little mini freak-out, before Akira sat her down and explained Morgana's situation to her. "You doing okay now, Joker?"

"Yeah, I am. Thanks. And how many times have I asked you to stop calling me Joker?"

"Sorry. Some old habits die hard. I guess a part of me yearns for those days again. Or at the very least, I yearn to walk on two legs and hold things with thumbs again. Never take those little suckers granted, okay?!"

Akira laughed at the cat's plight. Morgana had always been good with his paws in the real world, and had gotten even better as the years have gone by, but it still doesn't compare to having hands. After putting the milk back in the fridge, Akira sighed. He pet Morgana's head and scratched behin his ear, much to his simultaneous annoyance and pleasure. He then took his glass and went back up to the bedroom.

As he sat on the bed, he reached to his shoulder, feeling for his scar. The vicious scratch that Masayoshi Shido's Shadow had given him in their battle. He found himself wondering what could have happened to Shido. The last time he saw Shido, he was bawling his eyes out  _thanking_ the judge and jury for the guilty verdict. He figured Shido was probably peacefully serving a life sentence in prison. Akira was ashamed to admit that part of him wished he had been shanked or something, but he shook the dark thought from his head.

"... Akira?" Sadayo grumbled.

 _Damnit,_ Akira couldn't stop himself from thinking. Part of him hoped not to wake Sadayo, but another part wanted to talk with her about this. She always knew how to help him get through these things. Even if she didn't fully understand, she could tell what trauma he and the others had been through, and was always willing to listen. Akira wondered if Shiho could do the same for Ann, or what would happen if Futaba and Yusuke both had one on the same night by some Godforsaken coincidence.

"Sorry. I just... I was..." he stammered. He didn't want to tell her what had happened. That would mean thinking about it again.

"Did you have the nightmare again, honey?" Sadayo asked, slightly more awake now, out of concern for her husband. 

"... Yes," he reluctantly answered. "Yes I did. I'm sorry, I didn't want to wake you, I know you have class tomorrow, but-"

"Hey, hey. If it will help you get through this, I'm fine staying up to listen. That's part of my job as your wife, isn't it?" she said.

"And here I thought your job was to be the most beautiful thing on Earth..." Akira teased, but Sadayo knew what he was doing. The mask was still on. He was deflecting the topic. It wasn't the first time, and was unlikely to be the last.

"Akira, don't do that," she said, somewhat sternly. " I  _do_ love you, and  _because_ I love you, I'm trying to remind you that you're not alone in this. I may not understand all of the stuff with Personas or worlds of cognition or things like that, but I am more than willing to listen to you."

God, she was too good. She was the best thing that had happened to him. The pot of gold at the end of the torturous rainbow of his life as a Phantom Thief. And so, once again, he spent time talking to her about his nightmare. And once again, she listened diligently.

"I just... I sometimes wonder, what if I wasn't strong enough. What if I couldn't stop it? And I think about what happens to everyone... what happens to you... And I-I just..." And once again, the tears came. He was so strong, so confident all the time, but he was still human. He tried desperately not to show weakness in front of anyone, especially back when he was still Joker. But there were some nights where it got to him. And those nights continued well into his now-PTSD-ridden adulthood. 

Sadayo sat up and held him, rocking back and forth as he cried into her shoulder. "Hey... It's okay... It's just a dream... You  _were_ strong enough. You  _did_ stop it. And everyone is just fine.  _I'm_ fine. I'm right here, and I am not going anywhere..."

 _I wish I could do more for_ _him..._ she thought. _I wish I could understand all of this pain he and the others have. But I'm doing all I can... He gives me so much strength every day. It's my turn to give back._

After a few minutes, Akira's crying had stopped. He felt raw. Exposed. But also liberated. And there was no one who he would rather be with than Sadayo right now. She knew just what to say, what to do, to bring him back from his despair. He would never have to worry about losing her, about her leaving him alone.

He just had to learn to stop being so hardheaded, sometimes.

Akira pulled back from her shoulder, and wordlessly kissed her. The kiss was loving, tender and sweet. When they broke apart, they looked into each other's eyes. 

"I love you so much..."

"I love you too, silly. And I will never stop loving you, Akira."

They laid back down in bed, cuddling, and fell asleep.

Akira would feel far,  _far_ better in the morning, with his loving wife Sadayo holding him warmly.

**Author's Note:**

> I tried to write something not as happy as my previous stuff. Took quite a bit out of me, but I feel like I got my thoughts across.  
> Also, that last line of Yaldabaoth's was a nice little reference I thought of, purely spur-of-the-moment.


End file.
